So stressed out

So stressed out

Studying for econs essay now, and I’m so f***ing stressed out.

I’m so f***ing stressed out because there is so much to do and so little time.

And I cannot work like a f***ing machine gun just go! go! go! and no stops. I have to rest and take breaks and shit.

I’m so f***ing stressed out because of PEOPLE. Yes, people.

I’m not sure if I’m more ill-prepared than everyone else. But I guess what people perceive from the outside is different from what reality is.

Today, got upset when someone said “shouldn’t you have already memorised (a certain science subject)”

Unless you’re referring to prelim memorization, then OF COURSE I’VE F***ING MEMORISED. WHO DOESN’T MEMORISE FOR PRELIMS. AND MAYBE THAT’S BECAUSE I HAVE TO DO MY UK APPLICATIONS AND US APPLICATIONS, AND DO U KNOW HOW MUCH F***ING WORK IT IS?

AND MAYBE, TOO, THAT’S BECAUSE WE STUDY IN DIFFERENT WAYS.

MAYBE THAT’S BECAUSE ECONS IS MORE TEDIOUS THAN other subjects. YES NOT SURE ABOUT DIFFICULTY AND IT’S F***ING TEDIOUS. FOR A F***ING SL.

MAYBE BECAUSE I TAKE A VERY VIGOROUS SUBJECT I.E LIT WHICH STRESSES ME TO NO END BECAUSE IT’S A F***ING HL. AND IT’S LIT.

MAYBE WE HAVE DIFFERENT STUDY PLANS.

I FEEL LIKE A F***ING FAILURE WHEN YOU SAY THAT. WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

MAYBE I’M THE KIND WHO HAS TO GO BACK MEMORISING. I DO HOPE I WENT INTO MORE DETAIL THAN YOU DID, FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE AN UTTER FAILURE.

AND LET ME ADD (DON’T WANNA SOUND MEAN BUT SCREW IT) GUESS WHO DID THE COLLAGE?

And that boy, that boy who shares quite a few lessons with me, stresses me out too. I get stressed out by people who are completely chill.

But then again most guys are quite chill except for a couple who are honest/good enough friends to admit that they’re scared too.

Hrmmph.

SOPHIA, YOU CAN’T BE STRESSED OUT. YOU’VE GOT TO KEEP FAITH IN WHAT YOU’RE DOING. THE BOTTOM LINE: DON’T GET STRESSED OUT BY WHAT YOU ENVISION PEOPLE DOING BECAUSE YOU MAY BE PUTTING THEM ON A PEDESTAL THEY DO NOT DESERVE TO BE PLACED ON. AND EVERYONE MIGHT HAVE DIFF PLANS. 

 

(SORRY FOR THE RANT, SO MUCH ANGST)

 

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